K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
Randomize
