Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
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