I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
Randomize
