Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
Randomize
