So drunk its hurt
it was like his penis was on wheels.
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
Randomize
