Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
if I start to respond to these political texts with a middle finger emoji - do you think they will get the hint?
Randomize
