I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
Randomize
