Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
Just bought myself a coach diaper bag. I thought it would be perfect for school. the baby bottle holders are where i'm gonna put my booze
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
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