I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
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