Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
I fucking hate vegan toaster pastries. You don't fuck with poptarts. It's like baseball...it's the backbone of american sport and you don't change it. Poptarts are the backbone of american fatasses and you don't just go changing them.
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
After much deliberatipn and vodka, my favourite phrase of Christmas 2012 is "penis of last resort"
I don't know if I want context or not...
Context involves faux incest and champagne. Id go into detail but im on shot number 5.
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
Floor bacon is actually really good
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
Randomize
