hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
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i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
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I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
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