Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
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