Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
Randomize
