White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize