batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
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