Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
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Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
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