my head looks like a cockatoo
mine looks like a lions mane...looks like the entire zoo is going to prom
I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
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