He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize