What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
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