I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
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