Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
Never let your siblings swipe right.
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Randomize
