I fell asleep on the toilet again last night...
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
Randomize
