Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
Apparently, the right response to, "How do you feel about a terrorist being in the area?" isn't, "Well, we have vodka in the freezer, so we're good for now."
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
Randomize