i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
Randomize
