Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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