we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
Randomize
