my mouth tastes like poor choices
I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Randomize
