How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
Randomize