Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Randomize
