is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
when i say i joined a midget dating site why do u assume i was drunk
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
Randomize
