did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
Randomize
