Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
These 19 Teachers Had Very Inappropriate Interactions With Students
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
Women Confess 25 Instant Deal-Breakers On A Man’s Dating Profile
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream