he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
we should paint friendship bongs
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