Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
Im at a strip club, and the dancer just farted into my face. The bad part about that is I could taste the wings I bought her earlier
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
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