Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
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