so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
Randomize
