i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Randomize