I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
I don't get promposals. When I asked my date I was so drunk I couldn't lift my head. Then I puked on my lawn after he said "ok whatever". That's romance
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
