I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
He said "send me a motivational picture" so I sent one with mayo on my face that said "clearly I'm no stranger to white stuff on my face"...I'm the fuckingng worst
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
Randomize
