Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
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