I dont know whether to be proud of myself for not driving, or being proud that i was so messed up I couldnt drive
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
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