He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
Sometimes, when I pour the powdered creamer in my coffee I like to pretend it's Colombian grade cocaine.
That's the kind of morning coffee a girl could welcome the day with.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
Randomize
