How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
Stop inviting me to your birth control calender reminders...my job is to test its effectiveness, not know its schedule
Lmao sorry
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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