Tim hortons said i dont meet their criteria. What the fuck criteria is that? You put bagels in an oven.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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