the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
Randomize
