Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
Randomize