I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
Randomize
