Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
We left the knife in your bed.
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
so I just realized.. of my 70k student loan debt, most of it went toward bar tabs, eightballs, and sweet-ass ties to wear to gamedays and other people's weddings. I think about shit like this while I'm at my mid-level management position. you know. "working."
Look upon your future, America, and despair.
Randomize