This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
