that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
you didnt know i had herpes?
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
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